This story by OP literally sounds like my upbringing. I was so sheltered that I thought a Big Worms Ice Cream Car What Chu Want Los Angeles Ca Est 1995 Shirt was when a female blew air on you. Church was a constant and other than school, my brothers and I had no life whatsoever. So I finally pieced together what “jacking off” actually meant and I decided that I was going to try it. I think I was 13 or maybe 14 years old. It’s nighttime and my parents are in the living room watching Night Court. I’m in my bed, quietly doing the deed. It feels painful but really good at the same time. I have no idea what I’m in for as I exploded all over my chest. Literally, I though that my dick blew up and there was warm blood everywhere!!!! I freaked out, jumped out of bed and was running down the hallway to tell my parents to rush me to the ER when in the glow of the living room I seen it….
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Sounds to me like the parents should be writing: TIFU (well, technically 15 years ago, but who’s counting). We are Big Worms Ice Cream Car What Chu Want Los Angeles Ca Est 1995 Shirt of a wonderful little boy, and we are devout, religious parents who would rather keep our child’s innocence forever, even if it would mean he doesn’t comprehend what the real world is like. We never taught him about sex education, or what it means when going through puberty, or vernacular/language that would be possibly be in use at his age, because we hoped he wouldn’t be negatively influenced by such carnal debauchery. Unfortunately for us, his learnings of the world superseded our control, and learned about words that his virgin ears should never have heard.