She wanted to feel loved. Her husband was too busy with work, and the fear of losing the only thing she felt loved her may have added to her own traumas from her own Don’t be Malone be my valentine shirt. The fear must have ate at her soul, and she would’ve hated herself. But fear is so powerful, and often destructive. She pushed away those she loved before they could leave her…a self fulfilling prophecy…so that the fear would no longer eat away at her. It would’ve instead left her empty.
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I feel so deeply for you, your mother and your brother. Abuse is too often generational in that abuse suffered by one generation can leave mental and emotional wounds that Don’t be Malone be my valentine shirt. None of you deserve this. And not you, your brother nor your mother are at fault. Your mother cannot create strength when she doesn’t feel supported, and strength is what she needed to not allow her fear to win. And it wasn’t your job to offer that support. Your mother needed your father to be her husband.