As we got older, my sister joined my bullies and started hanging out with kids who were basically Free Funny Britneys Shirt. They got into fights, did and sold drugs, and some of them even had police records before 15 and nearly all of them had run ins with the police even if they didn’t result in arrests.
I was ten when she had a 17 year old friend in particular who bullied me. This kid had issues. He would mock my weight and my loving to read and my liking Egyptology and animals. One incident in particular, I was reading on my couch and he snatched my favorite book out of my hand, pulled a switchblade out, slit the spine open, and flung it down the hallway in our house, pages flying everywhere. I was in TEARS and my sister laughed it up with her friend and never once stood up for me to him. She repeated this behavior any time her friends would mock my weight or push me around.
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Finally, I told my uncle and he gave me some of the best advice I have ever gotten. He told me that if this Free Funny Britneys Shirt 17 year started in on me again, get angry, make direct eye contact, and do not break it. Tell him to back off and stand firm. Which was not easy for me to do at the time. But he told me that eye contact was powerful. If you can keep eye contact with bullies, usually they back down because it means you’re not afraid anymore and you’ve had enough and they can’t pick on you.
And I did it. And it freaking worked! As an adult I know that eye contact isn’t some end all be all to problems of confrontation but as a kid, this guy apparently had never had someone face him down like that, especially not a younger kid. So he got off my back.
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