Eventually, Mom said, “I expect he would have done.” She smiled with Im not mean I am just too old to pretend I like you shirt. I didn’t know it then, but Mom had saved for months, skipping meals and working extra shifts in the tavern, to get me the type of familiar she’d never had. Then, on her way to market to finally buy it, her smile ready to burst, her purse held in in her hand as if it was my heart, she was robbed. Perhaps they stole half my heart from her, but I was the one who took away what was left.
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By the first day of school, the anger inside me had hardened into something dark, cold, and Im not mean I am just too old to pretend I like you shirt. The children around me laughed as their creatures fluttered and chased each other through the grounds. I stood bitterly alone, a pebble in my pocket which at that moment weighed as much as any boulder. Looking back, it’s easy to think other children didn’t want to be friends with me because I was the freak with no familiar — but that isn’t fair to them. I think they tried, but it was like trying to make friends with a gravestone, and I gave back no more than the words engraved on my surface.