Definitely have the same here. A lot of stuff my dad did to us I don’t even mention because they sound like elaborate Im Retired Do It Yourself Shirt . Like the time I bought flowers for my mom at the local florist. She got home from work and my sister had friends over. We all sat down to dinner and all the heads of the flowers were missing. It was just a vase of stems. I thought my sister and her friends has used them for some craft project so I asked if it was them. It wasn’t and she sensed a bad vibe so she left with her friends. As soon as they walked out the door he said ‘I did it! I cut the head off the flowers! Because you left a piece noodle in the dish you washed!’ So I ran out of the house crying because he was psychotic. I mean, you can’t tell people these things because they assume it’s a lie, or worse, they believe you and think you’re like that too.
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I can understand the fear of Going entirely NC. she enforced and trained and manipulated to ensure you were not confident enough in yourself to truly break away. Let me tell you that you are. Im Retired Do It Yourself Shirt may still make mistakes and things might get rough here and there, but we all make mistakes and have struggles sometimes. I went low contact with mine, and she continually disrespected my boundaries. I then went fully no contact. After that I began to see I could be successful. I can do all the regular adult things she said I wasnt responsible enough to do (like pay my Bills, hold a job, raise a family). And that my life was better for cutting her out of it, as I was finally able to breathe.