The first night Kinley was at my house was a rough one, understandably. She had a cast on her Life Is Better With Cats Around Shirt and while she’d been on them for a while, the painkillers still did a number on her so she was groggy as hell. She hadn’t been able to attend Chesley’s funeral and honestly didn’t seem very upset about that. I’d put a few framed pictures of she and her mom together in the bedroom that was to be hers, decorated it the way I thought a little girl would like. Pink stuff, ponies, babies and coloring books galore. The first morning she spent in the house, I went to her room to check on her and found all the photos of she and Chesley had been turned face down on their perspective surfaces. I thought maybe it was just a coping mechanism. Maybe it was too early to be plastering pictures on the wall. I didn’t now what I was doing anyway.
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I’d gotten the position I’d interviewed for the day I got the news. I loved it, even if I’d spent a lot of Life Is Better With Cats Around Shirt just pushing papers and writing emails. It was the job I’d dreamed of having and I was buckling in for the long haul. I picked Bo and Kinley up from the neighbors house one afternoon about two weeks ago and we headed home to order some pizza (I know, real healthy right? My parents give me so much shit over a little PapaJohns every once in a while). We walked in the door and Kinley went to her room without a word, but this wasn’t unusual. That was how she’s been since the accident. While Bo seemed to be coping well, thriving even, Kinkey seemed to withdraw more and more each day. I’d scheduled play dates with other kids, taken her out for individual nights of movies and ice cream, all the fun stuff I thought she would enjoy and every time she spent the entire night looking solemn, not saying a word. Several mornings I had awoken to find my once closed bedroom door then open, as well as Kinley’s, and her curled up on top of the covers instead of under them. This broke my heart a little because I thought maybe she’d gotten up to come sleep with me and just lost the nerve or changed her mind. I always told her that she was welcome to sleep with me whenever she wanted and that she didn’t even have to ask, just come curl up, but she never did.
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