“For my final request I will merely say this. Even with all the money in the world, and the most exquisite companion, I would have to be downright tricked into allowing my daughter to leave my Straight Outta April 1980 Retro 41 Years Old 41th Birthday T-Shirt. If you wish for me to let her go you must convince me black is white, and up is down, because only the onset of absolute madness could make me give up my daughter.”
Remmy stood silently for a few moments, thinking of what she could do. She didn’t have any more magical items or helpers, but unbeknownst to her there was an ally waiting in the wings. Audre had seen her father conduct his sick, self-validating game with hundreds of suitors. She had plenty of time to think of her own solutions to the challenges, and the means to achieve them, but had not been interested in any of the suitors enough to assist them. They all had wished to take her for themselves and make her live the same life as her father had forced upon her, but Remmy was different. She did not look like anyone she had ever met, and she talked to her father in a way no one had ever done. She even bested him twice! And…she had called Audre by her name.
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Sadly for him this was not the case. Remmy had used a monkey’s paw to fulfill his first request, meaning it was granted in a way that rendered it ultimately ineffective. His treasures did indeed brim with valuable Straight Outta April 1980 Retro 41 Years Old 41th Birthday T-Shirt and his accounts maxed out in funds, but such an increase in the money supply at once caused its value to decrease to barely a fraction of what it was worth just the day before. He was assuredly not the richest man in the world, and in fact significantly less wealthy than he used to be. He soon found out his exquisite companion was yet another deception when Phorm reverted to its original form and slimily plopped itself on The Duke’s lap, demanding to be stroked on the crown of its head.
By this time Remmy and Audre were long gone. The Duke’s rage, which had been fomenting for so long, finally bubbled over and started to boil him alive. The painful burning sensation only angered him more however, and he heated up enough to burst into flames. The Duke sat burning in his throne, Phorm happily lapping up the viscous & foul liquid which oozed from his poisonous heart.
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