I’m not supposed to be up past my curfew, so when I listen to music I When The Hoops Go On Le Lefa Come Out shirt to listen out so I can go into emergency protocol if my parents walk in and see me up late drooling over a photo of something random with an array of art tools between my fingers obviously not sleeping. So I was listening to the conversation casually in one ear, and an 80s bop in the other.
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So back to the story, it was fine until my Dad said “Oh my goodness, this is the When The Hoops Go On Le Lefa Come Out shirt … other than getting a blowjob of course.” And I stopped the music and took the other earphone out and put down the art stuff and silently screamed into my easel. Did I just hear that right? My Mum mumbled something back, and then my Dad was like “Oh, so there’s no chance of a blowjob then?” and my Mum mumbled something back, and then I was just freaking out, because my parents have always been so personal about their sex lives, and I wanted to just put my headphones back in and turn up the volume so that I didn’t invade their privacy, but at the same time, a sick, twisted part of me wanted to listen in and hear how it panned out, don’t judge me for that.