It isnt done easily thats for sure. I’m still at the work of being comfortable with who I am and Im about to be 50. My first blush response to what you wrote is a poster I had Hogwarts Alumni Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titillandus shirt, the only zen you find at the top of a mountain is the zen you bring with you. I think the work of life is done in it, right where you are. My sense, and its only that is that she took great strength and comfort in being pursued and courted.

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I would urge her to remember that her partner loved Hogwarts Alumni Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titillandus shirt so much she chased her down! That even with a shift in their relationship she remains that desirable soul. Being the object of someones affection is heady stuff. I want this woman to see the shift as the next chapter, not a regression. And I agree, partners are where we should have needs met and be nourished.